Are you a winger, are you a do'r or do nothing

[Susie]

I am not normally a winger but today I am. For the past year my family and I have been to hell and back and those that know the true picture will understand my rant. For those that know lttle or nothing about the past year it is coming up to the annversary of my husbands passing on mothers day amongst other porblems and issues.


It seems a few members only ever moan about what we are trying to achieve yet do nothing or even try to do anything. This is a great shame for this site and the majority of us and just wish they could be more supportive.

Lets all try our best to do whatever and whenever we can to promote our site and get some immigration reforms through, once we achieve this we can most definately move on to other immigration reform issues, human rights and others


My heartfelt thanks goes out to all who have and will continue to support our efforts whether past, present or future members

Anyone else having a bad hair day?

[Munish]

Anyone else having a bad hair day?

I think I got my third white hair last week. What a nightmare. Does that count?

[DEE F]

I am not normally a winger but today I am. For the past year my family and I have been to hell and back and those that know the true picture will understand my rant. For those that know lttle or nothing about the past year it is coming up to the annversary of my husbands passing on mothers day amongst other porblems and issues.


It seems a few members only ever moan about what we are trying to achieve yet do nothing or even try to do anything. This is a great shame for this site and the majority of us and just wish they could be more supportive.

Lets all try our best to do whatever and whenever we can to promote our site and get some immigration reforms through, once we achieve this we can most definately move on to other immigration reform issues, human rights and others


My heartfelt thanks goes out to all who have and will continue to support our efforts whether past, present or future members

Anyone else having a bad hair day?

Hi Sue, I dont really think that people dont care and dont want to do anything,I think a lot of it is knowing what to do,because no one wants to listen!!!!!!!! Maybe like Annie says we can have a brainstorming at the meeting on Wed and throw ideas about,take care and keep your chin up,will be thinking about you tomorrow.

Love Dee xx

[kirtida8]

I can totally understand where you are coming from - and to am frustrated at how many times I get told " nothing is going to change so why bother?"
The saying "all mouth and no trousers" springs to mind :(
I will be thinking of you tomorrow, and hope that things do start to change. Maybe most are just waiting until we get some small victory before joining the bandwagon?

[anniefromessex]

Before I say anything too much, I will just add to the comments above - my thoughts will be with you tomorrow Susie and my heart goes out to you.

I will say just one thing, because:

I think the above post is directed at me, if I am wrong then I am sorry but I have been spouting off a bit lately but as usual I am telling it like it is. Unfortunately I have been unable to attend Meetings because of Ted's parents being here for a month and mother in law being very ill whilst here, thereby missing one meeting, going back to England
for nearly 4 weeks and missing the next meeting so, therefore, yes I have missed a lot (other meetings I have missed also because of being back in the UK) - much as I would love to have been to these meetings I cannot magic myself there. Other people who were here do not always attend because of unforeseen circumstances or just because they don't want to, but just because I have talked from the heart just lately and believe you me it IS from the heart, then it seems as though people think I whinge but want to do nothing! That is not the case, and if people really knew the ramifications of what has happened to our family because of this country and its laws, then perhaps you would understand just why I am so bitter - it is not for public display and I will leave it that way but suffice to say I am angry, bitter and don't think I will ever be the same person again, this country has torn our family apart and I for one, once we leave, will never set foot on these shores again - they have taken my money, they have taken what should have been a happy life, they have nearly taken my life and I will not allow them to hurt me and mine anymore.

I understand Susie if you want me to resign from the site, what with my negative feelings and all, but believe me when I found this site it was like a lifeline to me and I felt able to vent my feelings in a good way, but I understand your take on the situation - you can't have me ranting and raving and doing nothing positive, when you are trying to keep it altogether.

We all have our cross to bear, and mine is being truthful - got it wrong again!!!

Love Anniexxxx

[Kriz1]

A lot of people have had a lot of problems over the last 6/12 months...I've been doing this over 6 years now and I've never seen so much upset pain and anger before...I don't want to see you go Annie..I'm sure others feel the same...I may not always agree with you...but I have had the same feelings you have about the USA..and I know how much forums helped me get through some very dark days...

[peter gold]

Annie
No one wants to see you go.
Your postings tell it as it is, and people should see the bad and the good.
Hope you get what you want.

[kirtida8]

Hi Annie, no my comment was not directed towards you. Your plight has been heart wrenching to read about, and I completely understand where you are coming from. I am relatively new to the site and to have found it to be a lifeline for me, but have noticed that whist plenty of people have expressed strong views, very few have actually stepped up to support things like the rally, as Sue also pointed out. I too probably will not be able to attend many (if any) meetings or coffee mornings because of my workload - but I try to make up for that by doing whatever I can to get the message out to as many people as I can. On one of the other threads, I was actually told that I was being naive in thinking that we could actually get anyone to listen let alone change the status quo! I think that it is that type of negativity that Sue was referring to, and not your right to be bitter at the blows that have been dealt to you and your family. It is actually stories such as yours that help to motivate me to try to change things so that others will not suffer the same fate. But that is just me, and I do not know the ins and outs of others to make any rash judgment, but on the surface it does appear that some prefer to sit back and let others do the donkey work. I may have got it wrong - but that is the way it comes across.

[Tarlena Jenkins]

Jeez... all you people do is make me cry..... (Bit woosy here!!) I think of all the ladies I have met, remember thier stories, and wish YOU ALL as HAPPY a Mothers Day as you can possibly experience in these times of strife, memories and futures...
Believe me... however sad you all feel for personal reasons, you gave ME the strength to carry on. Please take this from MY heart, that I appreciate all the advise you gave me.
Good On You All!!!!!!!!!!!

[Tarlena Jenkins]

Thankyou.... hard to say, but hardest to portray in the REAL meaning of the word.
I am thankful.xxx

[haytonmac]

Susie ,will be thinking of you and your family in the coming days ,but as for either doing or not .....sometimes those of us who havent had to fight or struggle quite as hard as others are made by some on the forum to feel uncomfortable because we have had it "easy"and our issues are not the same as the majority of folk on this site.It is very hard to help when all you ever hear is how horrible ,awfull etc life is here?how dare I who has in comparisin to others and easy ride to a greencard!!its some how my fault!i'm at times made to feel unwelcome by certain people.I dont come to meetings for that very reason and also because I feel I have nothing to offer.Annie ,this is NOT aimed at you ,you have always been friendly and I'm sorry you are having to leave to be able to try and rebuild your lives else where and I wish you all the very best for you and your family.Life here is not easy for any of us but going on about the negatives al the time is not helpfull to anyone .But to those who havent judged me because of my greencard and got to know me as a person thank you ,I certainly wouldnt have got through the last few months without you and your support. x

[SHEILA 13]

Annie,You know my feelings about all this.

Take Care of Yourself.

Sheila

[DEE F]

Before I say anything too much, I will just add to the comments above - my thoughts will be with you tomorrow Susie and my heart goes out to you.

I will say just one thing, because:

I think the above post is directed at me, if I am wrong then I am sorry but I have been spouting off a bit lately but as usual I am telling it like it is. Unfortunately I have been unable to attend Meetings because of Ted's parents being here for a month and mother in law being very ill whilst here, thereby missing one meeting, going back to England
for nearly 4 weeks and missing the next meeting so, therefore, yes I have missed a lot (other meetings I have missed also because of being back in the UK) - much as I would love to have been to these meetings I cannot magic myself there. Other people who were here do not always attend because of unforeseen circumstances or just because they don't want to, but just because I have talked from the heart just lately and believe you me it IS from the heart, then it seems as though people think I whinge but want to do nothing! That is not the case, and if people really knew the ramifications of what has happened to our family because of this country and its laws, then perhaps you would understand just why I am so bitter - it is not for public display and I will leave it that way but suffice to say I am angry, bitter and don't think I will ever be the same person again, this country has torn our family apart and I for one, once we leave, will never set foot on these shores again - they have taken my money, they have taken what should have been a happy life, they have nearly taken my life and I will not allow them to hurt me and mine anymore.

I understand Susie if you want me to resign from the site, what with my negative feelings and all, but believe me when I found this site it was like a lifeline to me and I felt able to vent my feelings in a good way, but I understand your take on the situation - you can't have me ranting and raving and doing nothing positive, when you are trying to keep it altogether.

We all have our cross to bear, and mine is being truthful - got it wrong again!!!

Love Anniexxxx

Whoa there Annie girl whoa there!!!!!!!!first and foremost I do not think Sues comments were aimed at you,i think we are all as guilty as the next person,we are all capable of "doing something" about the situation ,but sometimes like you I to feel like saying,what is the point,all this country cares about is the protection of the illegals and I again like you are sick to the back teeth of it,and if being negative about the broken immigration system and the illegals is whinging then I my dear am just as guilty as you.It certainly doesnt mean I dont care because I do as I am sure you do,but I still ask the question what do we do,is anyone out there prepared to listen and change things for the better,I am not convinced,however it wont stop us from trying we are made of stronger stuff than that ,but please Annie dont blame yourself,if all of us said it like it is and meant it the world would be a much better place.remember there are leaders and there are followers,we have to decide ourselves which category we are in,when we know that then perhaps we can move forward.On a last note Anneka you are one of the nicest people I know,and I certainly have never thought you have had it easy,with the immigration systen as bent and as broken as it is I dont think anyone has an easy ride of it,anyway all have a nice evening and Annie you keep telling it like it is,the truth never hurt anyone.

Dee xxx

[Susie]

I think I got my third white hair last week. What a nightmare. Does that count?

Yes anything counts, and thanks for bringing a smile to me today

[Susie]

Hi Annie,

No definately not directed at you, maybe the hundreds or so lurkers that do nothing not even post

You have been there for me and me you, well I like to think so. You have helped me so much in the background, bingo night etc., and know exactly what you are going through.

It has probabley come as a shock for me to post in this way as usually I am so upbeat or try to be but am having a rough time myself, really rough.

Think I was just trying to get things off my chest and this thread was intended to be an out of the box , so we could all have a good moan then fell better but I was trying to hopefully kick start some members into posting and helping as well

[Susie]

Annie
No one wants to see you go.
Your postings tell it as it is, and people should see the bad and the good.
Hope you get what you want.

Yes Peter agree

All of us need a good moan from time to time, myself included, which happened to be my day today.

[Susie]

Ok,

Why not turn this negative thread into a positve thread,

I truely beleive if a few of us with heartfelt stories, booked an appointment with a reporter and got them to publish our stories, we have nothing too loose. We may only gain sympathy but if nothing else be able to get our emotions off our chests and tell it like it truely is

Carol's story really got to me as did lorraines, Annies , Doreen's and others so would anyone be willing to throw caution to the wind and go for it?

Any takers please pm me and maybe get together to discuss

[Munish]

Ditto with all of the above.

[SHEILA 13]

Susie,
I dont know anyone from this site who think negative,yes we all have "our off days"
I think people look at things differently,I dont think for a minute that all of the members are happy with their lives in America as I am sure at some time in their time living here something has gone wrong be it family,buisness,visa's etc.
We are all grateful to have this site to find info out on more or less anything you need to know and most importantly meet new friends,in my case I think will be friends for many,many years.

Sheila

[lorraine]

Hi Susie thinking of you today and I am sure your husband is with you also...

I have had a very bad week, but still feeling very positive.

We all have our problems and have to work out ways to solve them.. I truly believe in fate and what is meant to be will be, but you can make it happen also.

I was wondering Susie can you not buy your son a business on say E2 and just get him over here with you? If that was at all possible I know thats what I would do. Life too short just get him here.

Annie we love you to bits and your posts and we are all devastated you are going. Totally understand where all your posts are coming from and totally agree with them all.

Take care Love Lorrainex

[britcan]

Hi guys- I am a do-er, not a whinger!! Just let me get down to Rhode Island May 23rd and once we have settled in and got the business going, you will see a lot of movement from me in that area...I was actually picked as a candidate for the'Referendum Party' run by Sir James Goldsmith in the UK, remember those days?

Susie- please save me 4 bumper stickers a 2 t shirts and when I have an address in Rhode Island, I will contact you and make arrangements to send a cheque for you to mail the stuff to us..

Guys another thing we can do is go to Sign a Rama- they do those vinyl adverts that stick on the window of a car but you can still see out of. Now when we were looking at our sign for Adrians truck for the new business, he has a Dodge pick up- so quite a big window, it was $350 and that included colour. So I am not suggesting we all spend that, but I would imagine that we could get a reasonable size for say $50- would be worth it to get the word out there..

[MyOwnBrit]

I have 3 'nothin's ever gonna change' people at home here and what's sad (to me anyway) is I am trying to get things to change for you all because this cause needs as many people as possible and the more citizens who shout the injustice from the rooftops, the more people that will tune in.
My mother has a favorite quote (and I don't remember who said it and might not get it right, but it's very appropriate here)

Never underestimate the power of a small group of people.

As it's mother's day, maybe I should call that mother of mine. Hmm.....such a bad daughter.

[byjove]

Hi all.

Susie.................... what can I say? You seem to be the back bone here, which is a tough position to be in, as you are always there to support us all. Take the spine away and you are left with nothing, everything becomes detached. So, from my heart, if the back bone (you) feels like it wants to shout, scream, moan or whinge, then you are entitled to! And on today of all days!!!! YOU GROAN GIRL!!!!!!!

I am sending you a huge hugg! And a THANK YOU< just for being who you are!

[Kriz1]

haytonmac I've also gone through the 'what do you know...you have a greencard'..with a few people..I had to put them right on a few points...
The fact that you have a greencard and still take the time to come to the forum and take an interest shows that you care...and people should remember greencard holders are future voters...

[haytonmac]

thanks to all , x

[anniefromessex]

Hi Amanda,

With you in our corner, we can only go from strength to strength. So looking forward to meeting you tomorrow, as I am sure all the rest of the clan are.

Anneke, don't let em get to you girl - jealousy is a terrible thing - you are taking nothing away from them so do your own thing, enjoy Steph and eventually Craig when he comes out, and just feel glad that you have the chance of a good life.

Byjove, agree with all you said above - even though you are going thru the mill you are still taking time out to care about others, thats how it should be, good on you.

A very belated happy Mothers Day to all you Mum's out there.

Love Anniexxx

[byjove]

Hey! What can I say! We are all in the same boat and if we use different sized oars some will work more than others even if we are all paddling as fast as we can! I think the idea is to educate us and future expat members into making the oars all the same size and working together, that way we can all get further! I hope what my babe is going through will help others. Love ya all!

xxxx

[chris]

You will alwasy get the do nothings as well as the do somethings. However, taking a strike for example, there will be the folks who withdraw their labour and lose their pay and there will be the ones who man the picket lines too. But don't knock the ones who don't man the picket lines as do nothings as they have done something.
I think what I'm trying to say is the best way forward is to recognise evry persons individual strengths and use them to the fullest. For example take Munish (please take Munish!). He is still in the UK, so can't take part in any rallies or similar things over here, but he has a law expertise, which isn presently being utilised in an incredible way for the benefit of this group. Susieis driven in a way that is way more than anyone else in the group and has found her way into the arms of politicians and media people (not literally I hope), so her expertise is being used in that way. Many others simply contribute to the overall discussion and debate on this site and are thus doing something.
So I'm afraid I can't agree that no-one doesn't do anything here. Everyone does something.

[InnVic]

Even if you're not active on the political side - by running your business succesfully your having a positive effect. IF we can show that British Citizens ARE making a positive finaincial contribution to the US then this should also count for something as it supports the argument that we should be taken seriously.
Due to my location I can't participate in rallys etc. Whilst I can (and have) contacted local senators my personal agenda is different, i.e whereas its clear that EPV focuses on child issues I have tried to raise awareness of the 'whole picture" particularly the delays as I'm sure even by only speeding up the application this would make the E2 experience far more humane.....so far though with no reply - I have no vote so they appear not to give a toss!

[Kriz1]

It is hard to do something when you are so far away from the main group with very few if any other Brits around....but every little helps..I'm glad Sue trusts me to help with the running of her site...so many people come here every day to help others out with problems...but it would be nice if more lurkers would join in...you don't need to be an expert...just telling your story good or bad gives others hope that they will get there in the end...or that they are not alone....

[byjove]

I think people "lurking" are worried about a clique situation, (I havent dont this before, they all seem very pally, what if they reject my views....... so on and so on) But NO!

COME ON IN!!!!!!! :hug We are all friendly, we will always welcome new comers, so......., grab a coffee, glass of wine or whiskey in some cases I have heard!!!!! And give us your views, chat and vent if you need to, but please join us! Every person has something of value to imput good or bad! :)

[Kriz1]

You have a point there byjove....but I think the welcoming parties far outweigh anything else...we have our ups and downs...but I know I and all the other members of the ex-pat team will try our best to look out for everyone new member or old....if anyone has any worries then please feel free to PM me...any problems big or small...

[Emmalee25]

Hello all,
from a previous full on member, and now one of those lurkers. This site was extremely helpful to me when i was in the midst of E2 nightmare. I would like to think i was helpful, i donated, designed biz cards, attended meetings, held a party so everyone could meet etc.
I got a reporter involved, who delved too deeply and everyone fell out with me.... lol

Im still doing alot of stuff in the background with my lawyer, I think some changes can be made and so does he, but not HUGE changes all at once. Ive been thru a nightmare ad have ended up in the unenviable (is that a word?) position of being on change of satus from B to E2 and therefore landlocked....against the advice of my VA...sigh.... it really is a hard road..we do all need to moan, but, like Annie, i feel that this post may have been aimed toward me too....ive already stepped down as mod etc....so dont need to leave...lol

I passed on my best to thru Mark and Ashley Sue and have sent a big bag of ringpulls for th Ronald Macdonald House...hope you got them from Mark

Take care all, great to see the ones i do at coffee mornings.
Hugs n stuffs
Em x

[DEE F]

Hello all,
from a previous full on member, and now one of those lurkers. This site was extremely helpful to me when i was in the midst of E2 nightmare. I would like to think i was helpful, i donated, designed biz cards, attended meetings, held a party so everyone could meet etc.
I got a reporter involved, who delved too deeply and everyone fell out with me.... lol

Im still doing alot of stuff in the background with my lawyer, I think some changes can be made and so does he, but not HUGE changes all at once. Ive been thru a nightmare ad have ended up in the unenviable (is that a word?) position of being on change of satus from B to E2 and therefore landlocked....against the advice of my VA...sigh.... it really is a hard road..we do all need to moan, but, like Annie, i feel that this post may have been aimed toward me too....ive already stepped down as mod etc....so dont need to leave...lol

I passed on my best to thru Mark and Ashley Sue and have sent a big bag of ringpulls for th Ronald Macdonald House...hope you got them from Mark

Take care all, great to see the ones i do at coffee mornings.
Hugs n stuffs
Em x

Hello to you to Em,nice to hear from you it seems ages since we heard from you or yours,I for one was sorry to see you go as a mod you did a good job,and you where one of the first people to welcome me to the site and made me feel welcome,so lurk away there girl,any input is better than none at all,take care.


Love Dee xxxx

[lorraine]

Hi Em nice to see you today e mail you this week for meet upxx

[Kriz1]

Hi Em...nice to have a bit of an update....I thought you'd gone back to the UK to wait for a visa...?

[anniefromessex]

Hi Em,

Likewise from me, it was good to see you and Mum today. As Dee said you was one of the first to welcome me to the site and you did make me feel very welcome so even if I've never said it before - Thanks!!!

Love Anniexxx

[Emmalee25]

Hi Kriz,
My whole visa journey is a jumble :eek: we wanted to avoid change of status as id heard nothing but bad things, BUT in the end it was a choice we made.
We are hoping its not a long term thing, as im not a fan of the E2 at all But it suffices for now......:) Just working out How long me and my husband would need to be a part for him to get the H1b sponsorship he has been offered next year......?

Oh oh oh.....AND, my cousin and his family are moving to Florida in October! he got one of the golden H1b visas.....im sooooo excited...Leeds is invading Central Florida :p

Em x

[Kriz1]

Did you read that they may stop giving family members visa's to follow husbands and wives coming here in H1Bs...it will become if pasted a single person's visa...I'm not sure if this will go anywhere...but keep an eye on it...

[haytonmac]

congrats Em thats excellent news ......yorkshire invasion of daveport beings....lol
xx

[byjove]

As I said somewhere else!! Pass the KY!!!!